Twins are hard work. One is upset and you calm them only to see the other walk head first into a corner. Put down one to settle the other and the first screams as you’ve abandoned them. Continue on repeat until…well I’m not sure until precisely when as we’re still going on loop in this house.
However, aside from the cliched ‘double cuddles/love’ bonus of twins, I’ve also come up with some more practical benefits of bringing two little bundles of joy into the world at the same time.
Trying to please everyone
Firstly, however different their personalities may be, generally they are roughly physically and emotionally able to enjoy similar activities. I often look at families with children even with a relatively small age gap and feel lucky I don’t need to try and find outings, holidays and crafts that suit both ages.
Economies of scale
On occasions we also benefit from economies of scale. Bulk buying nappies and sibling discount to toddler groups really work in our favour. It may only be buy one get one half price but that’s still better than having to pay full price for two at the same time.
Many of my friend’s toddlers, who have older siblings, are in such a rush to grow up. No longer do they want to sit in a high chair or use a plastic plate. Why would they when everyone else is doing something different. Yet with double delights, they are never alone and so there seems less pressure to move into the next stage.
Obviously this probably doesn’t apply to twins with older brothers and sisters but for now my two haven’t even realised that there is an option to sit on the big chairs or face forward in their car seat. Long may their obliviousness last.
Your own nature vs nurture study
Finally, being a twin mum is proof that nature and nurture both have a roll to play. I’d imagine it’s very easy with different aged sibling to compare and think ‘well maybe I treated them differently’ to explain behaviour/sleeping/eating problems. With twins they have almost identical experiences. Daily routines, adult interactions, toy exposure and social engagements are all the same so how do they turn out so different.
It’s reasurring to know it’s not something I’m doing wrong but just that they both have their own completely unique personality traits, strengths and weaknesses. One day these will develop into passions and talents to be explored and nurtured. To be strong willed as a toddler definitely feels a challenge. However as an adult this trait will be an asset. That’s what I’m telling myself at least.